April 30, 2008


I have always had so many people around me who are smoking, that at times one may assume I have become so used to the smell, the smoke and the ash being all around the place. But the reality is that I have been used to the smell (I have almost become immune to it), the smoke (that can be resolved with proper ventilation) but the ash being in the air and on the various things is something I have not ever been used to. In fact I hate the ash flying about the house and things have ash strewn on them, which usually is mistaken for dust too. The ash is much more difficult to get off the upholstery and many a times, the cleaning procedure leaves faint gray streaks which only make the matters worse.

My father smokes and has never ever had a motivation strong enough to give it up. He reduced it only when health was proving to be a concern. The extend my mother tried to make him understand is overwhelming, but for those who smoke, I think it is not a concern as they all tend to believe in the extremely easily philosophy – ‘ It wont happen to me !‘

My father finally decided to bring his smokes drastically down after the doctors gave him a scare. Mind it, my mother is a doctor, an anesthetist to be more specific! But then, that never ever mattered. I think it is so disheartening to know that what your wife says to you is not important, but what truly makes a difference is what someone whose job is to say the same thing to everyone says it to you also! I think this just made my mother not interfere with what my father wishes to do about his smoking. Anyhow it didn’t matter that what she felt was the true scenario with no bias and no duty interfering, with the what the docs were saying.

I wondered then how I would react to such a situation. Will I become not bothered, or would I tend to pursue in spite of knowing that my words are falling on deaf ears. Knowing me, I do not think that I am capable of setting about with perseverance to make someone better. I believe that this is something which is that person’s complete personal choice and should be left to them to deal with. I feel I would just follow my mother and be quiet regarding matters where one can not make any effect.

But at the same time, I am not the kind of person who would like to be written off as inconsequential especially without a reason, and hence on fore thinking I believe I would become very irritated and maybe also adamant to prove my point in any other means.

Anyhow, I guess that would be good for the smoker anyways!


  1. intresting....

    i "shall" try to give it up!!!
    not motivated enough thou...
    scared rather...

    but a nice write up!

  2. casperbaba: Motivated you enough to try, thats step one !

  3. There's an old adage in portuguese that I can't translate nor do I remember an english equivalent but it means that often at the house of a specialist their knowledge isn't put into action. Example: a man who works as a cook and won't cook anything at home or a doctor that doesn't treat the people that live around him. I don't know if it's the case where you live but many of the doctors I know are the ones that smoke more. So...sometimes knowing what's good for us isn't enough, nor telling other people that they should stop smoking.

    But we care about them so we keep trying, right? ;)

  4. My cousin was staying with me for sometime n he had this habit.. Though he doesn't smoke at home, I was not comfortable with the feeling that he smokes!! So I had fought with him many a times but finally gave up.. :(

  5. Gosh..did this post strike a chord. My dad smokes, even after a bypass surgery..and hubby smokes too. Fed up as I am with these two people, I have also tried everything to 'scare' them. But as you rightly say, "It cant happen to me" is a thumb rule esp for my hubby...

    As for me, I claim with pride to the hubby also that I have no addictions of any kind. Women are generally smarter...I think. And they have a lot more self control.

    Smoking is a reprehensible habit... Wish my hubby would kick it!

  6. Devilsmood: I so agree, many never ever practice what they preach!

    Dhanya: Me on the contrary am trying to keep my persistence maybe gonna try some ways like, make them play/exercise and then show how unfit smoking makes one! ;)

    Ritu: Totally agree with you, my dad wont leave it for sure. Reduce.. yes, but quit ... naah !
    Just trying to think of some innovative reasonings!

  7. It is hard when someone you care about has an addiction and just won't let it go. Unfortunately, it is always up to them to stop.
    I know how it feels to have my opinion completely disreguarded and then how frustrating it is when someone else says the same thing I just did and he will listen to them. It hurts and makes me feel small.

  8. Rayne: So so true Rayne, its good that they are doing whats good for them, but why can't they just take us more seriously. We only want whats good for them !

  9. from lalit
    think abt the following statement:

    "I think i shud take up smoking. It will neverthless make my wife and near ones more near to me due to their concern in the form of reproachment"

    scolding other person abt not doing enuf for good health is one of the best ways of showing how concerned u r.

    t think i read it in a magazine where a man of abt 30-35 felt neglected by family.

    will he b more neglected now?
    will some gap b bridged?


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