July 22, 2016

Something always on the cards

When I moved to Bangalore, and when I was staying on my own, one of the first things I did was to go to CUPA and adopt a cat. I have always been a dog person, and even today, I am one. I just didn't think I would have the time and dedication or discipline required to have a dog. And I did not want to put a dog through the troubles, because of my indiscipline.

Named her Whisky and she was with me for over 2 years. And then marriage happened, and then I knew that I would not be able to be for her as I wanted to be, and I thought about how I would be able to give her that place she was so used to in my life. And, somewhere deep inside, I knew I would not be able to do it. And it was a decision which I believe was one of the most difficult for me, to give her back to CUPA. I didn't know anyone who would be willing to take her in, and letting her be was not something I believed was an option.

Today, for some reason I felt like going back to CUPA just to see whether she is there, or has she been adopted. How is she doing? This is not the first time I have ever thought of it, but the guilt which was ridden me when I think of going back and seeing her, I just can't get myself to do it. I rather just live in the belief, a wishful one, that she is doing fine.

There are many other days when I think I should now get a dog, but I doubt that will ever happen. I am not sure I will be that dedicated a person with T & V also in tow. Which makes me think maybe another 5 years down, I shall be able to manage. It would be like taking another baby on, but the love and affection a dog shows is just something which I have never seen any other animal shower a human with. Makes me crave for it. A little selfish maybe, but I can surely return a portion of that in some form, or so I believe.

All said, I don't see it feasible before 5 years...  so shall rethink and hope at that time.