May 19, 2017

A Speed Post story

Today, I witnessed something which made me realize how important a good public education system is and how much that very system is lacking in India.


I had gone to the Post Office to send out a Speed Post package, and I was in queue waiting for my turn. Ahead of me, was a office errand boy holding two envelopes and some cash. He also had an office ID card with a company monogrammed neck strap; it said Social Alpha. Just before his turn, he checked with the counter whether he needs to write 'Speed Post' on the envelope and he was informed 'Yes'.

Now, he was visibly uncomfortable and slowly took out a pen from his pocket and proceeded to write on the envelope. He slowly put down SEEBD. And then he looked at it again and put the pen back. In a second, he again took out his pen and wrote a P.

So, now it was PSEED.

All this while I was standing right behind him and watching, waiting for my turn. When I saw PSEED, it just triggered a thought in my mind. This is what T would do when she misses a letter in her word. But, she usually puts the letter above or below the word at the right position. And here was a man of 25-26, who was doing pretty much the same thing. She was just going to start Class 1, and she has been trying to get words together, and read stuff and write them too, at times.

This incident just made me realize, the problem is pretty much at the start of the education system, for all those who are with the public system in this country. This person has not been given the right guidance from such a young age, and how can we expect them to work towards any professional degree where language is treated as a given. But, I was happy to note that he could get himself to spell, and correct his mistake too.

Yet, I don't know what hope lies for the people of India if a basic education is not even a given.

March 12, 2017

Changing or maybe not.

I guess I come here only when I need to speak out without thinking. Maybe that is the very reason I created this blog. A space for me to speak, exactly the way my mind speaks. I do not need to filter it as per social norms or any approved word lists. There are so many instances I speak to myself just looking at the mirror. This again gives me that freedom to speak my mind and not worry about repercussions.  Maybe you would be doing so too, at least I wish to believe so, in my last attempt to appear sane.

I even have a label here on the blog for all these ramblings which my mind throws out... it is quite a few. Better here than bottled up.

How different people become over the years, and when those people are close then it affects the equations which you once shared with them. Its sad that human beings keep changing and what your feelings and emotions are today, won't be the same after a few hours even if the surrounding picture is unchanged.

Then it makes one wonder whether if it is just you changing that you seem to perceive the changes in others, changes which might actually never be there.

I am unsure which is the truth, maybe it is a bit of both. I strongly do believe that its difficult to not change through time. What say?

November 18, 2016

When you just do not have answers

I remember when I started to read blogs, and gingerly stepped into the world of blogging when I was still in college, I used to read a blog called Just a mother of two... many would know she is an acclaimed writer now, and her blog, page and social media have changed a billion times in these 7 odd years!

And from there to now... to think of it, now I am a mother of 2. I certainly don't think that I am anywhere close to what I remember her days to be. My days are purely a scramble, and full of squabbles, where mostly I do not even know why I am fuming. I just have no energy at the end of the day, but I still do not feel I have done one thing which I will look back at through the day which just passed. And I feel sad about it.

Shouldn't you be thrilled and happy about each day which has passed? Or is that meant for just books and narrations from unknown folks?

Some days I feel I should be working towards some goal, but I do not see the time or motivation to take out time from the crazy day to work towards these goals.

Then who am I blaming?

I do not think this is a phase and it will pass, it is something which I need to change.

July 22, 2016

Something always on the cards

When I moved to Bangalore, and when I was staying on my own, one of the first things I did was to go to CUPA and adopt a cat. I have always been a dog person, and even today, I am one. I just didn't think I would have the time and dedication or discipline required to have a dog. And I did not want to put a dog through the troubles, because of my indiscipline.


Named her Whisky and she was with me for over 2 years. And then marriage happened, and then I knew that I would not be able to be for her as I wanted to be, and I thought about how I would be able to give her that place she was so used to in my life. And, somewhere deep inside, I knew I would not be able to do it. And it was a decision which I believe was one of the most difficult for me, to give her back to CUPA. I didn't know anyone who would be willing to take her in, and letting her be was not something I believed was an option.

Today, for some reason I felt like going back to CUPA just to see whether she is there, or has she been adopted. How is she doing? This is not the first time I have ever thought of it, but the guilt which was ridden me when I think of going back and seeing her, I just can't get myself to do it. I rather just live in the belief, a wishful one, that she is doing fine.

There are many other days when I think I should now get a dog, but I doubt that will ever happen. I am not sure I will be that dedicated a person with T & V also in tow. Which makes me think maybe another 5 years down, I shall be able to manage. It would be like taking another baby on, but the love and affection a dog shows is just something which I have never seen any other animal shower a human with. Makes me crave for it. A little selfish maybe, but I can surely return a portion of that in some form, or so I believe.

All said, I don't see it feasible before 5 years...  so shall rethink and hope at that time.